Searching for housing in New York sucks. I don’t even need to go into detail – everyone already knows about the tiny, windowless closets people rent out for $2,000 a month, not to mention the bugs and the roommates and the apathetic landlords and the pet restrictions and fees. 

Read more

I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing right now. I haven’t written in a few weeks. My boyfriend and I decided we’re splitting up when our lease ends at the beginning of September. 

Read more

This is a sappy, emo entry, so if you’re not in the mood to join me with eye-liner and side-swept flat bangs, this is your opportunity to leave the theater. TY. 

That said, I’ve been feeling forlorn lately (to be fair, this is how I’ve started nearly 87% of my journal entries since 4th grade). I’ve been thinking about love. How are you supposed to know if someone is “the one”? Are you supposed to just know? 

Read more

You know that story about WWI soldiers giving their opponents chocolate bars on Christmas eve, mid-war?

I feel like that’s the point my acne has reached.

Read more

Apparently, my Dad is going to Thailand with my big sister next year when she has reassignment surgery. He doesn’t want her to be alone.

Read more

It’s a rainy Saturday; I’m on my second bloody mary of the day, and I’ve been sitting back, catching up on the latest dog meme drama. Apparently, a couple weeks ago, the dog meme page, Floof Bork Snoot ‘N’ Boop Inc, was taken for ransom by the owner of the smash-hit sensation, Doge.

Read more

Jobs I’ve had since graduating college:

Juice & Smoothie Barista/Cockroach Warrior
Standardized Test Evaluator/Eye Roller
Waitress/Profuse Apologizer
Hotel Clerk/Stress Cryer
Data Entry Clerk/Stoned Employee of the Month
Law Firm Compensation Consultant/Wait really?
Standardized Test Evaluator/YOUR CHILDREN ARE GRADED BY DRIFTERS.
Dog Walker/Cowgirl Who Can Literally Make Leashes into Lassos
Tech Company Support Specialist/Grammatically Sound but Confused Gremlin

Read more